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Forgiveness




   I have been meditating to the following question: How do I know I have forgave someone who hurt me?

One person provided me with an insightful answer: I know I forgave a person when I think about them and I really wanna meet them and hug them and thank for the time we spent together. Another person offered a similar reply: You know you forgive someone when you may help them in times of need in spite of all the bad things that happened between you. Is it possible to have this with someone you deeply loved?

We all had our break-ups and our loses when it comes to relationships. It is a process to forgive someone. Sometimes it is easier to forgive the person who hurt us then forgive ourselves for participating in the act of being hurt. We allowed the other person to hurt us. We were accessory to the crime. As part of my forgiveness process I used several methods: prayers, meditations, forgive and release phrases/rituals. At some point, I decided to listen Ho'oponopono meditation while sleeping. The entire night I heard: I'm sorry! Please, forgive me! I love you! Thank you!. That night I had a dream. I dreamt of my ex-boyfriend, who decided to leave right before my birthday. Somehow, I loved him deeply.  We were in a kitchen and I was repeating him the words, but by the end of the dream his face transformed into my face. I woke up scared and full of thoughts. From that moment, I included I needed to forgive myself in any affirmation/ritual/meditation. 

Funny or not, he wrote to me at some moment offering his help regarding a real estate issue I had. I replied as diplomatic as possible, but I asked myself if I am ready to meet him, see him and talk to him. We didn't meet and I didn't follow through. 

I still ask myself if I really forgive him...I still ask myself if love is the powerful feeling to drive forgiveness in me....

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