To settle or not to settle?

 I started the year with a wedding in my extended family. I actually enjoy family gatherings until I feel the social pressure. The question or the apropos regarding when will I get married. The funny part is that I notice this desire stronger from other people than myself. It was a surprise that my mom wanted me to have the marriage experience, even though she was divorced twice. This question adds  to my series of questions:

-Why should I get married? Is this an extraordinary experience? Do I need to give and take for a happy relationship? Do I have enough space to grow? 

I did a bit of digging inside myself. My idea about myself is that I identified with the wind, a wind on the move all the time. I never considered the times the wind stops. Who doesn't like the summer breeze on a hot day? With this in mind, my definition about marriage is that marriage is cage, entrapment, something that takes your freedom and kills your spirit. On the other hand, marriage was coupled with the fairy tales, they met, they fall in love and they just marry. It seemed that love was enough to through anything and everything. It was enough to build  an empire or whatever one wants. I never considered  common values and visions.

When you dig inside yourself you find what you want in a form, when you start digging other people's yards or relationships one starts to grow a vision on what they want. Each couple I've met somehow is successful, but some I admire and I would like to live something similar. The couples I have found successful kept their relationship away from parents, friends and other possible influences. If they let someone into their relationship, it is controlled: what they share, how much and what is the purpose. When they are going through rough patches, they stay and discuss those until a solution is found. There is no running away, no separation taken into consideration. There is always constant work and development to be done. The couple I admire most have been through therapy both individual and together as a couple. A relationship requires a lot of forgiveness and love and support.

Besides all the ingredients to make a marriage successful, the most important question to answer is why you are doing it. If you marry to build something (family, business or both) or just to thick something from your list and be in line with what society wants.